Introduction of Marriage
Marriage in Islam is said to be an important part of the life of a Muslim man and woman. In the Arabic language, the word “ Nikah” is used for marriage and is formed of three Arabic root words “na, ka, ha,” which means an amalgamation of two things.
What is Marriage in Islam
Nikah, or Marriage in Islam is a contract between two people of the opposite gender who vow willingly to be with each other by accepting each other’s responsibilities and rights. They both have a relationship based on love and affection and satisfy each other’s sexual needs and desires. They establish a family by producing children and sharing each other’s sorrows and joys.
Purposes of Marriage in Islam
To get calmness/ comfort
A man can find peace, security, and comfort in his spouse and reduce his or her tension.
Allah Almighty says in Quran;
And of His signs is that He has created wives for you from yourselves that you might find rest in them, and He put between you love and affection" (30. 21)
Marriage in Islam is half of deen
After getting married, a Muslim tries to avoid sins, do good deeds, and get nearer to Allah, which boosts his imaan.
Holy Prophet( PBUH) says:
‘Whoever gets married has safeguarded half of his religion.” (Ibid)
To fulfill sexual needs and desires
A human being is a social animal who has some desires and needs that are necessary to be fulfilled in a legal way; otherwise, it is not only harmful to humans but also to society. So through marriage, a man can satisfy himself and avoid sin.
Marriage in Islam is the sunnah of prophets
All the prophets of Allah got married, even more than one woman at a time, and Prophet Muhammad(PBUH) got married eleven times. However, a Muslim can marry four women at a time, according to Islamic law. According to a hadith:
“Four are from the practices of the Messengers: modesty, the use of perfume, the use of the tooth-stick, and marriage.” (Sunan At-Tirmizi)
Prophet Muhammad(PBUH) says:
“Marriage is my precept and my practice. Those who do not follow my practice are not of me."
Command Of Allah
Allah Almighty says in Quran:
"Marry the single people from among you and the righteous slaves and slave-girls. If you are poor, Allah will make you rich through His favor, and Allah is Bountiful, All-Knowing." (24:32).
Protection from sins
Allah’s Messenger(PBUH) says:
“Young men, those among you who can support a wife should marry, for it restrains eyes from casting (evil glances). and preserves one from immorality; but those who cannot, should devote themselves to fasting, for it is a means of controlling sexual desire.
The foundation of a family
A husband and wife have children after marriage and form a family which is an unsurpassed structure of the community. They bring up their children according to Islamic laws which is beneficial for the well-being of society.
Marriage in Islam eradicates the practice of Celibacy
Islam forbids celibacy and monasticism and urges one to be moderate. Prophet Muhammad(PBUH) advises Uthman bin Maz’un to be moderate when his wife complains that her husband used to perform ibadah and avoid sexual relationships with her.
Obligations and Conditions of Marriage in Islam
Allah Almighty has set some obligations and conditions for a valid and lawful marriage in Islam. If one of these conditions remains unfulfilled that marriage cannot be called a valid or Sahih marriage.
- Consent of both girl and boy
- Confession of both partners verbally, that is called Ijab( offer) and Qabul( acceptance) in the presence of witnesses
- Presence of two reliable, mature, and sensible witnesses
- Presence of the guardian ( Wali) of the girl’s consent
- Time must not be fixed for the duration of the marriage
- Mahr ( Anything or amount that a groom must pay to his bride at the time of marriage however they both can mutually agree to delay the payment.
- Boy and girl must be halal for each other according to Islamic law.
- Both partners, witnesses, and guardian must not be in Ehram
Types of Marriage in Islam
Following are some types of marriage in Islam and they vary according to conditions, obligations, and implications.
- Sahih Nikah/ Valid Marriage
- Batil Nikah/Void Marriage
- Fasid Nikah / Irregular Marriage
- Nikah Muta / Temporary Marriage
- Nikah us Shigar
- Nikah ut Tehlel/ Halala
- Nikah ul Misyar
- Interfaith Marriage in Islam
Sahih Nikah / Valid Marriage
This is the most common type of marriage in Islam which fulfills all the conditions and obligations prescribed by Islam. A marriage or Nikah will be valid and lawful if it is conducted according to Islamic laws. This marriage is based on mutual agreement of both parties including the boy and girl in the presence of the girl’s guardian and witnesses. Proper verbal consent ( Ijab o Qabul) of both partners takes place in the same meeting.
Batil Nikah / Void Marriage
A marriage or nikah is Batil or void that does not meet all the necessary conditions or requirements set by Islam. If any of the above-mentioned conditions are unfulfilled in a marriage then we cannot call it a valid marriage. In void marriage, both partners can be separated without following the legal divorce procedure because their nikah is not valid and they are not legal husband and wife.
Hazrat Ayesha narrates Hazrat Muhammad(PBUH0 saying:
“Any woman who marries without the consent of her guardians, her marriage is invalid…”[18]
Fasid Nikah / Irregular Marriage
Fasid or irregular marriage violates partial necessary requirements of a valid marriage but this type of marriage can be valid after fulfilling the required conditions. For example, if a man gets married without witnesses then he will make his nikah valid after remarrying his wife. This type of marriage is acceptable in some Islamic schools of thought.
Muta Nikah / Temporary Marriage in Islam
When two people marry for a fixed time period for the sake of pleasure that is called Muta Nikah or Temporaray Mrriage. In this type, a person marries for a specific time period which can range from a few hours to several years, and after that, the marriage is automatically dissolved without a formal divorce process. Muta Nikah was common before Islam but now this is considered as a void marriage in some sects of Islam. Although this marriage does not violate any Islamic rules however this is not recognized in some Islamic schools of thought.
Nikah us Shigar
In Nikah us Shigar a guardian demands a girl to marry himself or his son from the groom’s family and the amount of mehr is not fixed or paid. In Pakistani culture, this marriage is called “Wata Sata marriage”. Holy Prophet(PBUH) forbade Nikah us Shigar because Mehr is not paid in this.
Ibn Umar said: “The Messenger of Allah forbade Shighar. Shighar is when a man says to another man: 'Marry your daughter or sister to me, on condition that I will marry my daughter or sister to you,' and they do not give any dower (i.e. neither of them give other the dower).”
Nikah ut Tehlil / Halala
This type of marriage takes place when a woman wants to marry her ex-husband who has divorced her. For this purpose, she has to marry someone else for a specific time period to make herself halal for her ex-husband. After Halala her husband can marry her again but in Islam, this type of marriage is discouraged for certain reasons. However, if a woman’s husband gives her divorce for some other reason or dies then she can marry her ex-husband. But to marry someone for the purpose of Halala deliberately is haram according to the Islamic point of view.
Abdullah bin Mas'ud narrated: The Messenger of Allah cursed the Muhill and the one the Muhallal was done for.
Nikah ul Misyar
In Nikah ul Misyar, a person marries a woman on the condition that she waives willingly some of her rights for example right to housing, and right to financial support for certain reasons, and lets the man fulfill his desires. Although this type of marriage meets all the essential requirements of a valid marriage however the condition of giving up rights is not appropriate and is against the nature and purpose of marriage. In Misyar Marriage a man is carefree about his wife and he is only concerned about his desires. According to some Islamic scholars, Nikah ul Misyar would be appropriate in some scenarios. For example, a woman who has to support her parents or family can do misyar marriage.
Interfaith Marriage in Islam
In Interfaith Marriage a Muslim man can marry a non-Muslim woman of the book ( Christians, Jews, and Sabians), and that non muslim wife is not to be reverted from attending church for prayer and worship. But this rule does not apply to Muslim women.
Which people are forbidden to marry?
A person who does not have the ability to perform marital consummation or a person who has some physical defect is forbidden to marry however if his or her partner is agreed after knowing the disability then they can marry.
For which people marriage is obligatory?
Marriage is obligatory for the person who is physically fit and is able to take responsibility for his wife. It is obligatory to get married for a person who fears committing sins(ZINA) in case of not marrying.
Abdullah (b. Mas'ud) (Allah be pleased with him) reported that Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said to us: 0 young men, those among you who can support a wife should marry, for it restrains eyes (from casting evil glances) and preserves one from immorality; but he who cannot afford It should observe fast for it is a means of controlling the sexual desire.
Is love marriage allowed in Islam?
Islam strongly permits meetings or relationships between a man and woman before marriage. However, meeting once before marriage is allowed with certain conditions. Man and woman can meet each other before marriage in the presence of one of the woman’s mahram. Islam allows both men and women to select their spouses and parents should not force their children to marry against their will.
How many marriages a Muslim can do at a time?
A Muslim man is permitted to have four wives at a time according to the Islamic point of view however there is a condition of doing justice to all of them.
Allah Almighty mentions clearly in the Holy Quran:
“And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan girls then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice.” [al-Nisa 4:3]
How to satisfy yourself before marriage in Islam?
Allah Almighty has put some natural desires and emotions in human beings and sexual urge is one of them that a human feels at a certain stage of life. A man either a boy or girl who has this type of problem should not adopt any illegal way or commit sins. Instead of this he/ she should follow the teachings of Islam and try to remain in a morally pure environment and should avoid the things that can cause to arise sexual desires. Holy Prophet(PBUH) recommended fasting to control the sexual urge.
'He who can afford to marry should marry, because it will help him refrain from looking at other women, and save his private parts from committing illegal sexual relation; and he who cannot afford to marry is advised to fast, as fasting will diminish his sexual power."
Cousin Marriage in Islam/ First Cousin Marriage in Islam
Islam allows cousin marriage because they are not mahram to each other.
Allah Almighty says in Quran:
"O Prophet! Indeed, We have made lawful to you your wives (to) whom you have given their bridal money and whom you rightfully possess from those (whom) Allah has given to you, and (the) daughters (of) your paternal uncles and (the) daughters (of) your paternal aunts and (the) daughters (of) your maternal uncles and (the) daughters (of) your maternal aunts who emigrated with you, and a woman believing if she gives herself to the Prophet if wishes the Prophet to marry her - only for you, excluding the believers. Certainly, We know what We have made obligatory upon them concerning their wives and whom they rightfully possess, that not should be on you any discomfort. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful" Quran 33:50
However, it is not a condition that you must have to marry your cousin. Holy Prophet(PBUH) encouraged his companions to marry in different tribes. Islam permits all Muslim men and women to choose their spouses according to their own will. Today there is a notion that marrying your cousin will cause some genetic problems in children but this is not true in all cases. There are many examples of cousin marriages lying around us and many families are living a healthy life. Disability or any genetic disease cannot be confined to only cousin marriages because there are certain other factors. Being a Muslim we should have faith in Allah and nobody should reject his/her cousin on the base of this weak notion.
What is the age of Marriage in Islam?
According to Islamic point of view a girl or boy should be married after reaching the age of puberty however no fix age has been set because all the girls will not reach to puberty at the same age. Despite of all these factors a girl or boy should also be mature enough to understand the nature of marriage or his/her responsibilities. The legal age of marriage in Pakistan is 18 years for both girls and boys according to Federal Shariat Court( FSC).
Which qualities a man should consider in a girl before marriage in Islam?
According to Islamic teachings, a man should consider the following qualities in the girl whom he is going to marry.
- The girl should be Muslim or religious
- She should know the basic teachings of Islam
- She should have a strong character
- She avoids sins
- She keeps a company of good people
Hazrat Abu Hurayrah quotes the Holy Prophet( PBUH)’ s saying:
“A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty, and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman; (otherwise) you will be a loser.” ( Al-Bukhari)
Which qualities a woman should consider in a man before marriage in Islam?
A woman should consider the following qualities in a man whom she is going to marry.
- He should be a good Muslim and religious
- He should know the basic teachings of Islam
- He should have a strong character
- He avoids sins
- He should be mature, moral, responsible, and strong
- He should have the company of good people
Holy Prophet(PBUH) says:
"A man follows the religion (i.e. ways and manners) of his intimate friend. So, each of you should carefully consider whom he takes as his intimate friend."
Before looking for the above-mentioned qualities in our spouse we should think whether these qualities are present in ourselves or not.
Dua for Marriage in Islam
Here is a dua everyone should recite for a newly married couple.
بارَكَ اللّهُ لَك، وَبارَكَ عَلَـيْك، وَجَمَعَ بَيْـنَكُما في خَـيْر “May Allah bless you, and shower His blessings upon you, and join you together in goodness.”
